A Golf Joke

A guy is playing golf and hear's a voice.

Voice "Hit driver"

Guy: "WTF! Who is that?"

Voice: "Hit driver"

Guy: "But this is a short par 4 and there's trouble everywhere!"

Voice: "Hit driver"

The man hits a driver that rolls up on the green and ends up 2 feet from the hole. He eagles it and is now 2 under after 8 holes. They proceed to the next hole, a Par 3.

Voice: Hit 4 iron.

Guy: "But the hole is 195 yards long. I need a 3 iron"

Voice: "hit 4 iron".

The guy hits a 4 iron and it goes into the hole. He's now 4 under after 9 holes and walks to the 10th.

Guy: "holy sh!t! I'm 4 under! This is the best round of my life! What should I hit now!"

Voice: "hit driver"

The guy hits driver down the middle and birdies the next hole. After a few more holes he gets to the 18th tee and is 6 under par, the best round he's ever had by 4 strokes.

Voice: "hit driver"

Guy: "But, I'm 6 under and there's out of bounds on the left and right. Are you sure?"

Voice: "hit driver"

The guy hits driver and yanks it left out of bounds.

Guy: "Sh!t! I just hit it OB! What do I do now?"

Voice: "hit driver"

Guy: "WTF! I just yanked one OB and you want me to hit driver again?"

Voice: "hit driver"

The guy yanks another one OB

Guy: "Dammit! That's four strokes wasted! What should I do now?"

Voice: "hit driver"

Guy: "Are you friggin' nuts? I just hit driver OB twice!"

Voice: "hit driver"

The guy yanks yet another shot OB and has now lost 6 strokes.

Guy: "F#ck! Another one just went out of bounds!"

Voice: "Hold up. Is this the 17th or 18th?"

Guy: "It's the 18th for crying out loud!"

Voice: "shit"

FamousDavis wrote:Voice: "shit"[/i]

how vulgar!

Mental game gallore!!!

A foursome of guys were waiting at the men's tee while a foursome of women was hitting from the women's tee. The ladies were not rushing and were taking their time.


When the final lady was ready to hit her ball, she hacked it ten feet. Then she went over and whiffed it completely. Then she hacked it another ten feet and finally hacked it another five feet.

She looked up at the patiently waiting men and said apologetically, "I guess all those fucking lessons I took over the winter didn't help."

One of the men immediately responded, "Well, there you have it. You should have taken golf lessons instead!"

He never even had a chance to duck. He was only 59 .....

According to Bill Clinton, her head is getting better

FamousDavis wrote:According to Bill Clinton, her head is getting better

A reporter recently asked former president Bill Clinton about Hilary's head. Clinton said "Well, she's no Monica."

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